I made a cake. A glorious, delicious, flavorful chocolate paleo cake. I was bought I had greased the pan enough, but the chunk of cake that decided to remain in the pan mockingly told me otherwise. Because this cake was for a dinner party dessert, a pivot was essential. Inspired by a holiday episode of some Great British Baking by the Derry Girls, I knew exactly what needed to happen: trifle time. And I thought I had instant pudding. THOUGHT. I thought I had it. Alas, after a full examination of my cabinets, it was determined that my memory is a liar. But then I remembered that I know how to make custard. How much harder could it be to make a chocolate custard? I determined that it would take one additional step, one additional ingredient, and one additional egg yolk.

Chocolate Custard – Dairy Free/Gluten Free

4 egg yolks

Pinch of salt

330g/1 small can sweetened condensed coconut milk

Vanilla

3/4 of a pint of heavy cream (I used Califia dairy free heavy whip)

1 cup of semi sweet chocolate chips (I used Enjoy Life mini chips)

In a saucepan, beat 4 eggs yolks with the salt , condensed milk, and heavy cream until smooth and well blended. Make sure to use a metal whisk – it just works better than a silicone one. I keep meaning to research why that is, but I haven’t actually done it yet. Once all of the mixture is blended well, move to heat. Set your burner on a medium heat and stir constantly. It should start to bubble and the you will see it start to thicken. Once it thickens, add vanilla with your heart – at least a teaspoon. Stir well after adding the vanilla, the remove from the heat and immediately stir in all the chocolate. Chill for at least 2 hours before using. I chilled it for two hours, then slathered it in my trifle and chilled it for another two hours. My audience gave 100% approval rating and insisted that I write down the recipe for later, so there it is.